Tuesday, August 28, 2007

PoTM Meeting Minutes

In attendance:

Kurt Weller
'Skip' VanderDutch
'Scoop' VanderDutch
'Script' VanderDutch
Dean 'Uncut Deck' Bodbeil
Bobby 'Words' VanderDutch

Plaza of the Mind Quarterly Meeting Transcript:

Kurt: It has come to my attention that the Clustrmap for the new 'Deadline' Bob strip only has two dots on it - one in the Pacific Northwest, one in Texas.

Scoop: Yes sir.

Kurt: I don't know how I feel about those two audiences...

Bobby: You might want to rephrase that Mr. Weller.

Kurt: I don't know if I want to... uh... limit my readership to those two... uh... exceptional places... at this point.

Bobby: Sounds better sir.

Kurt: Any ideas?

Scoop: I showed the strip to a couple of teenage females this morning sir.

Kurt: And?

Scoop: They hated it sir, they are 'grossed out' by the character an they don't really seem to care about the mystery part of the strip.

Kurt: Anyone else?

Bobby: I talked to Bob over at Cussavco and he stated that the first round of encounter groups hated pages 2-9.

Kurt: They liked page 1?

Bobby: That is the only page that does not feature the 'Deadline' Bob character's face.

Kurt: How about the interactive part with the disco?

Script: That didn't work out sir... due to technical difficulties the mp3 file that was supposed to play along with the images of 'Deadline' at the disco couldn't be synced up to the flash-animated sequence I had created so I had to shelve the whole thing.

Kurt: What's up there then?

Script: Two pictures of 'Deadline' Bob dancing sir.

Kurt: That's it? No words?

Script: No words sir.

Kurt: Jesus Christ.

Skip: The guys at the gym liked the naked girl with the blonde hair sir.

Kurt: Go on.

Skip: They said they wouldn't mind seeing more of that sir.

Kurt: She has a bigger part later on right?

Bobby: Yes sir, she factors in towards page forty and makes many appearances after that.

Kurt: You think we can bump her up to maybe page twenty? And maybe get more of the girl singer and the girl with the purple hair in there?

Bobby: I don't see why not sir.

Dean: I think that you are totally fucking up the Plaza of the Mind with this 'Deadline' Bob garbage.

Kurt: Who let him in here? Skip?

Skip: He said he had an invite.

Kurt: Dean Bodbeil is never invited! Got it?

Script: Yes sir.

Kurt: You think we can pretty up the Bob character some?

Skip: Don't see why not sir.

Kurt: Okay, get that done would you? I've got racquetball at 1:30.

Plaza of the Mind Album Cover Analysis Series 0001 - The Yellow and Black Attack

I never understood exactly what Stryper was trying to say with this or, really, any of their album covers. This one, however, seems to suggest that the hand of Jehovah is guiding a batch of Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles at the Earth just after it has been occupied by the message of Stryper. (I base this on the fact that all of the continents appear in yellow and black - the color of Stryper - much the same way that they label a state either red or blue on news reports).

Why is Jehovah so angry? Is he punishing the Earthlings with the very message that they thought would save them? Was Stryper really an agent of the Lord or were they 'Devils in Disguise' as some of the more austere would have had you believe?

Isaiah 53:5 (King James Version)

But he was wounded for our transgressions,

he was bruised for our iniquities:

the chastisement of our peace was upon him;

and with his strypes [sic] we are healed.

Stryper had reportedly taken their name from this biblical verse. I am unsure how this relates to the ICBMs on the cover of the record. I also think that they were using 777 as a way of making the Christian rock kids think that they were cool because they had a number of their own, to compete with the 666 of such acts as Mercyful Fate and Iron Maiden, though there is no biblical reference to 777 that I am aware of [if you know something I do not please feel free to comment].

Now I know that you, the reader, may get the feeling that I am making fun at the expense of this Christian rock band's arguably feeble stretch into mainstream cool. You would be right. But I would also have you know, rather than being labeled a hypocrite, that not only did I own this vinyl LP, I also walked about the streets of Grand Rapids with a Stryper patch on the right sleeve of my jean jacket and was blasting the refrains of To Hell With the Devil into my ears with the headphones on too high, thinking to myself, 'if I go deaf at least it will have been for Jesus.'

When I make fun of Stryper, I am 'honestly'[1] only making fun of myself.

[1] 'Honestly' being one of Stryper's premiere hits.